Experiencing the feeling of being betrayed by a partner can be an excruciating experience. Infidelity, whether it’s emotional or physical, involves a violation of the pre-set boundaries of a relationship. While some signals of unfaithfulness are obvious, such as smelling of someone else’s perfume, spending more time apart, or being distant, others may be more subtle. This article discusses 11 unexpected signs that could indicate that one’s partner may be cheating.

Changes in phone habits
In long-term relationships, it is not uncommon for the partners to share their passwords or to be able to pick up the other person’s phone to browse or snap a photo. However, when one partner is cheating, they tend to become more possessive of their phone and may try to hide something. This behavior could also entail engaging with suggestive social media content online. While this may be a warning sign of cheating, it can often be perceived as a gray area within relationships. It is advisable to sit down and have an open conversation with one’s partner to address any concerns or suspicions.

Sudden changes in behavior and availability
It’s perfectly normal for people to have busy jobs or other obligations that prevent them from responding to texts or calls for extended periods of time. However, if one begins to notice a sudden change in their availability, it may be a sign that they are cheating. The key thing to look out for is any change in behavior. This development occurs because one needs privacy and a long period of uninterrupted time, causing them to be unreachable during certain hours.

Pays attention to appearance
According to therapists, a sudden surge in an individual’s interest in their physical appearance could be a telltale sign of infidelity. Changes like a revamped wardrobe, extended hours at the gym, or other physical changes that do not align with their personality could be potential signs that they are preparing to meet a new love interest or trying to gain attention.

Emotionally unavailable
In a healthy relationship, partners share their emotions, thoughts, and feelings with each other. If this flow of conversation stops, or one starts receiving superficial answers from their partner or is emotionally getting distant, these signs may signal infidelity.

Develops new interests
Engaging in new hobbies can be an exciting way to keep life interesting and broaden one’s perspective. However, if one’s partner suddenly starts adopting new hobbies or interests, it could be a matter of concern. This generally happens due to infatuation, when the partner tries to impress their love interest by matching their likes and dislikes.

Excessive display of affection
Just like being emotionally distant, being overly affectionate can be seen as a red flag for infidelity. Showering one with lavish gifts or planning extravagant vacations may result from the partner trying to cover up their tracks or alleviate any feelings of guilt.

Blame game
It’s a well-known strategy used by many to accuse their partners of cheating and emphasize the importance of fidelity in a relationship. This technique is referred to as gaslighting, which is a form of manipulation. The goal of gaslighting is to make the other person feel defensive and hesitant to speak up. 

Unexplained money issues
Large purchases or withdrawals could indicate underlying issues such as cheating, gambling, or excessive shopping habits. If one notices anything suspicious, it is advisable to talk to one’s partner and verify if their actions align with their explanation. Many people have discovered their partner’s infidelity through such transactions. So, it’s essential to pay attention to anything that feels off.

Behavioral change in close friends
When one partner observes a change in their friend’s behavior towards them, it may raise concerns about their relationship. The partner is usually not as careful about hiding their tracks and actions in front of their friends and may even confide in them. This can cause their friends to feel anxious or uncomfortable, initiating changes in their demeanor, warmth, or friendliness.

Shows signs of anxiety or shame
One’s body language can also reveal if they are hiding any secrets. In a successful long-term relationship, it is important for partners to feel comfortable talking to each other. As a result, they adopt a relaxed stance. However, if one’s partner begins to sway back and forth in the middle of a conversation or starts to fidget, it could be a sign that they are nervous or uncomfortable. Similarly, if they suddenly start slouching or avoid eye contact, it could indicate feelings of embarrassment, guilt, or shame for their actions. These signs could point towards infidelity.

Reluctant to make big purchases
One may also notice that their partner suddenly refuses to make big purchases, like a house or car, together. If this was not a significant issue in the past, this reluctance may result from financial constraints or infidelity. These major commitments can make it difficult for one to pull out of a relationship quickly. Experts suggest initiating an honest conversation with one’s partner about the situation.

Observing one of the changes listed above may not necessarily indicate infidelity. However, if one begins to notice multiple changes in their partner, it may be time to sit down and have a vulnerable conversation. Seeking the help of a couple’s therapist is also an option if needed.